Given the amount of time we spend at work, it’s only natural that some of us would consider the office as an ideal place to look for romance. What’s more, businesses are increasingly demanding longer work hours, and this means there’s less free time for employees – and for dating outside of the job.
Also, people working together usually have common goals and interests, even though much of it is work related. They also tend to have a pretty good idea what are each other’s likes and dislikes. And given that more women are in the workplace than ever, that’s a big plus for the guys!
Office romances, however, have their drawbacks. No matter how desirable the relationship may be, it is a potential recipe for disaster.
For example, due to the very fact that couples are in constant contact with each other, this can eventually cause friction between them. We all need to have some time to ourselves to cool out with friends and family or pursue hobbies.
Another potential problem is jealousy. All too often, office romances are kept secret. Because of that, other colleagues may end up flirting unwittingly with your partner. If this happens (and it often does) will you be able to keep your cool and not let it interfere with your professionalism?
Another thing to remember is that if the relationship goes sour, you still have to face each other day after day at the office. This could be painful to deal with and very distracting, and it can seriously affect your performance on the job.
Consider another scenario. You’re a manager and you have a crush on one of the members of your team. If romance develops between the two of you, would you be able to resist showing favouritism towards that person? This is what usually occurs, and even when there is no romantic attachment between the two individuals, the other employees may have the impression that there is. This can create an atmosphere of tension in the workplace.
Also, what if a couple working in the same department are having a fling, but later they break up? Will the inevitable tension in the air make it difficult for others around them to do their work effectively?
By the same token, if you’ve been having an affair with your boss and it falls apart, and you’re later passed over for promotion or you don’t get the raise you had been hoping for, can you be sure the breakup isn’t the real reason why?
Or just imagine a manager falls in love with one of the young men in her department and later, due to some issue related to his work, she is forced to tell him that he’s fired. One can easily see her being torn between her duty to her employer and her love for her partner.
Nevertheless, if despite everything, you still find yourself being irresistibly attracted to someone at the office, and you decide to follow your heart, here are some suggestions you may wish to give some thought.
- Proceed with caution and consider all the pros and cons, bearing in mind that if the romance fades and your work begins to suffer, or colleagues in your department start complaining, at best you could end up getting transferred to another department, and at worst, fired.
- It’s always wise to ponder carefully over how our actions can affect our employer and co-workers, and our own future. Sometimes the best way to avoid the complications associated with romance on the job is to prevent it from happening in the first place.
- In all fairness to your employer, your time on the job should be spent on your work, not on your relationship.
- Even if it happens and others in the office know about it, try and be discreet and don’t flaunt it. It can make those around you uncomfortable and make you appear unprofessional.
- If it’s a serious relationship and you and the other person plan to spend the rest of your lives together, it may be a good idea to tell your manager or HR.
Generally, employers tend to frown on romance in the office, but the reality is, like it or not, they can’t prevent it from happening. If they tried, for example by by putting a ban on dating on the job, it would only go underground. Some workers might even be offended and view it as an infringement on their right to privacy. Arguably, a company’s best option is to have a clear policy and guidelines to manage such relationships.
